The Bad Touch

A dildo is a sex toy, often explicitly phallic in appearance, intended for bodily penetration during masturbation or sex with partners.
A dildo is a sexual device resembling a penis in shape, size, and overall appearance. Some expand this definition to include vibrators. Others exclude penis prosthetic aids, which are known “extensions”. Some include penis-shaped items clearly designed with vaginal penetration in mind even if they are not true approximations of a penis. Some people include devices designed for anal penetration (butt plugs) while others do not. These devices are often used by people of all genders and sexual orientations, for masturbation or for other sexual activity.
Vaginal and/or anal penetration are the obvious uses. Dildos have fetishistic value as well, and some users wield them in other ways, running them over the skin during foreplay for example. If of appropriate sizes, they can be used as gags, for oral penetration for a sort of artificial fellatio. Some people also use specially designed dildos to stimulate the G-spot.

Dildos in one form or another have been present in society throughout history. Artifacts from the Upper Paleolithic which have previously been described as batons were most likely used for sexual purposes.
The world’s oldest known dildo is a siltstone 20-centimeter phallus from the Upper Palaeolithic period 30,000 years ago that was found in Hohle Fels Cave near Ulm, Germany. Findings of the archaeologists show that ancient Egyptians used dildos 2,500 years ago[citation needed]. Also, these sex toys were known to the ancient Greeks and sometimes depicted in art.
The first dildos were made of stone, tar, wood and other materials that could be shaped as penises and that were firm enough to be used as penetrative sex toys. Chinese women in the 15th century used dildos made of lacquered wood with textured surfaces. With the invention of modern materials, there appeared the possibility of making dildos of different shapes, sizes, colors and textures. There have been many references to dildos in the historical and ethnographic literature. Haberlandt, for example, illustrates single and double-ended wooden dildos from late 19th century Zanzibar.
In 1966, Ted Marche pioneered the manufacturing and distributing of rubber dildos and other sex toys.
Sex toys are a fun and safe way to bring excitement into your life.

Photos via Seventh.ru 

(More photos by kezzyn @ 35 Photo) 

Well, and I just remember this:
“Sweat baby sweat baby sex is a Texas drought
Me and you do the kind of stuff that only Prince would sing about
So put your hands down my pants and I’ll bet you’ll feel nuts
Yes I’m Siskel, yes I’m Ebert and you’re getting two thumbs up
You’ve had enough of two-hand touch you want it rough you’re out of bounds
I want you smothered want you covered like my Waffle House hashbrowns
Come quicker than FedEx never reach an apex just like Coca-Cola stock you are inclined
To make me rise an hour early just like Daylight Savings Time
Do it now!”